I learned at a very young age that God existed and that he was much bigger than I am. This was mainly because both of my parents believed in God. My dad is Catholic and my mom is Baptist, so before my parents divorced I went to Catholic school and church, and after they divorced, I went to Christian school and church. We were very religious.

My parents separated when I was ten years old, and it brought me great sadness. This was the first time in my life that I really began searching for meaning amidst everything. I started reading the Bible on my own and was baptized with one of my brothers when I was twelve years old. I had realized that the Bible was different and that it was living and active when you try to follow it. However, at the same time I was really having trouble loving my dad. I grew up very close to my mom and I took her side, blaming my dad for many of the issues in our family. My parents went through a four-year custody battle, and I felt forced to go visit him every other weekend. I once told him that I hated him and decided that I didn't want him to be a part of my life. My brothers would still see him, but I just kept my distance.

At this point, I decided that relationships are not worth investing in because of all the pain and potential sadness they can bring. I turned to trying to find my worth in my accomplishments. I believed that if I could be independent and on my own, then I would find happiness and meaning in my life.